Even with a mere 42 years of life experience, I’d confidently add to this the phrase “…and spend huge amounts of energy pretending that this is not the case.” Indeed, most people are hiding.
The young, in particular, need to know this – because as they face the normal ups and downs of life, they start out by believing what they’re told: that the “successful adults” around them are actually as “together” as they appear to be. Often, the young conclude that *they’re* not doing something right, because they don’t feel “together” on the inside. That seems like a terrible thing to have to admit, and so they learn to put on a good front – and hide their true selves.
And so another generation of “hiders” is born – who often become the “successful adults” who intimidate a *new* generation of young people into following along in the pattern.
Just for fun, let’s throw some gasoline on that fire.
What if you tend to pick up powerfully on the feelings & moods of those around you? What if, despite another person’s highly-practiced control of their facial expressions and body language (permanently set to the “Everything’s just fine” setting, when they’re in public), you could still sense anxiety and fear on them?
Well, simply put - In a world where most people are hiding their true selves, you might find that difficult and confusing. This is particularly true if you haven’t yet learned to tell the difference between your own feelings, and those of those that surround you.
What a lot of young sensitives don’t realize, though, is that it also means that you have a powerful gift, with the potential for great good. This is because of the reason most people are living in desperation: They believe they’re alone in having struggles, and no-one ever shows them otherwise. If you can simultaneously see past their hiding-screen and have the compassion to help draw them out by being Real about your own struggles, then you’ll have changed their world – and you’ll have done it in a way that others (who couldn't "see" them) could never do.
Christmas represents a huge opportunity to put this kind of thinking into action.
In spite of all its positive aspects, Christmas raises the bar of “quiet desperation” to record-breaking levels for most people. Many are spectacularly stressed about issues surrounding the Holidays, and simultaneously, they are striving to not give off the impression that they’re anything but Joyful – because they’re ashamed to admit it. It’s a safe bet that at no other time of the year are more people “hiding” with quite so much gusto.
As a sensitive, you can approach this Christmas in one of two ways:
You can be panicked about facing room-fulls of smiling-but-desperate people making Holiday-small-talk, and the waves of anxiety they pump out…
…or you can be the one person in the room who’s being Real, sees what’s actually going on, and gently calls people out of hiding, helping them to be Real, too.
To be Real with you, I’ll probably be doing a mix of both. :-)
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As an aside: On this topic, I am powerfully drawn to the work of Brené Brown, and her notion of “wholehearted” (genuine, authentic, and risk-takingly honest) living. Google her TED talks. You’ll thank yourself.
Also, check out this.
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